The people we love deserve our best social skills too.
We often show our worst to the people we love the most. Our social skills are buttoned up and polished outside of the home, but inside the home we tend to let loose. Maybe we should try a little more.
From strangers to your spouse… Studio 5 Relationship Contributor Dr. Matt Townsend shared some essential communication skills to improve any relationship.
Empathy Over Explanation
Empathy is crucial in any relationship. Dr. Matt defined empathy as: “when you care more about the other’s feelings than you do about your own opinion.” He suggested that by empathizing with others, we can manage emotions more effectively and build a stronger connection. Instead of jumping to explanations, we should first address the emotions involved.
Claim Your Baggage
In relationships, it’s essential to acknowledge and own our issues before addressing our partner’s. Dr. Matt advised, “If you really want power to talk to your partner about their problem, you first have to own yours.” By claiming our baggage, we create a more open and honest environment for communication.
Add Colorful Commentary
To make feelings more understandable, Dr. Matt suggested using “colorful commentary” in conversations. This means providing additional context and details to help the other person understand your emotions better. For example, using metrics or scales can make it easier for your partner to grasp the intensity of your feelings.
Dr. Matt also offers a program called “Becoming One,” where he coaches individuals on improving their relationships. He explained, “Every week on Friday, I sit down and do a call with hundreds of people… It’s just a really inexpensive way to get coaching every week and to work in a community where we’re all trying to become better.”
Learn more at matttownsend.com.
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