13 Funny Valentines

Who says Valentine’s Day has to be romantic! Sometimes the best way to
someone’s heart is to make them laugh.

Studio 5 Contributor Susan Neal says skip the grocery store card aisle,
because you can make your own handmade Valentine’s cards at home.

{this first card is my favorite. It’s just such a man thing, because you know, it
just wouldn’t work for a woman to give this to a man.

I used Pop up glue dots to secure the key…you could use a key die-cut too}
No quicker way to my heart than a good laugh… So why not take a break
from all the serious romantic stuff this year and put a smile on his face (or

This first one, I suppose isn’t so funny as it’s quirky. You can customize your
valentine with the QR generator. That’s what makes all those digital squares
you’re seeing everywhere. So simple. Just enter a message, a url, phone
number or sms for a very special and techie valentine.


Copy the code to a word document and print. If your recipient doesn’t have
the app, load it ahead of time. It’s called QR reader.

This one cracks me up every time I read it, in large part because of the
amazing illustration talents of Ron Leishman who graciously allowed us all to
print these cards for personal use.

Please visit and sign up for his toon-a-day service (which is free) at

I love how simple and to the ‘point’ this card is.
And it was kind of fun to break a pencil on purpose. 🙂
I used 1/2″ glue dots to secure the pencil on the card.

Ok, so maybe this is a little cornball…but it made me smile. I’ve included two
versions of this card at the download site. One has a picture of a fancy
chicken. Cute.

Another card for techies, or for that matter, even me. I do love my phone,
and sometimes putting the phone down or even turning it off is a sign of true
love. Or maybe just politeness?

I love this idea because just looking at it makes me pucker! It’s a fun little
anticipation gift.

Tie a cellophane bag with the tag or tuck a single lemon in your husband’s
lunch as a little surprise.

It’s also versatile. Think about anything that makes you pucker…a jar of
pickles? Sour Candy?

This card, if you can call it that is dedicated to my Math boys. A cute and
nerdy way to say I love you.

Here’s a little play on words using a BIG syringe for a ‘shot’. Fill it with
valentine candy, tuck a heart pick in the top and attach the cupid image.

You can get the larger syringes (60 cc) at specialty pharmacies, like ones that
cater to hospitals. I got mine at Taylor Drug by the American Fork hospital in
American Fork.

Cost about .60 cents.’

I’ve had this little valentine ditty for many years, just waiting for an excuse to
use it.

It’s a great anti-valentine gift…It still makes me laugh.

*What exactly is an anti-valentine card? Well, here’s a great explanation in
the form of a joke.

“the feel-good holiday that reminds you that if you don’t have a special
someone, you’re alone” ~ Lewis Black

This way, people without a special someone get to celebrate too…and eat
chocolate, and laugh.

I printed everything on plain printer paper so it would be easier to roll. Any
bottle will do. Just tape on end down and roll. Tie ribbon around to secure.
Fill bottle with Lindt balls. I tucked a bit of red tulle at the top before the
final message so you can’t see the balls. Take final message and wrap
around one Lindt ball and tuck it at the top of the bottle.
For the intellectual or philosopher in your life, here’s a perfect card, because
you have to think a bit before it’s funny.

I’m neither, but these glasses crack me up!

Got them at a dollar store for $2. Just print the card (not a folding one),
punch the sides where the glasses will fold over and tape in place in the

I remember Comedian Rita Rudner telling this joke. Priceless.
Not sure there is a real connection between the joke and this bandit/cupid,
but I had to use him, he’s just too funny.

And what is even funnier, is that I had to photoshop a gun…YES, a gun, out
of his other hand, because, well, that was just too weird.

Print & Fold Card.

I’m leaving the strangest card for last. Did you know how trendy zombies are
right now? I do, because I have young adults in my family. This is a print &
fold card.

As always, I try to keep my cards for Studio 5 Quick and ridiculously easy.
Why? Because I know not all of you make cards. But chances are good you
have a computer and a printer and for most of these that’s about all you

So, be sure to visit my blog, www.sueneal.blogspot.com
to get the free

Happy Funny Valentine’s Day!

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