You know how to react when someone shares the happy news they are
expecting a baby. But when a woman experiences a miscarriage…often it’s
hard to know what to say, or how to help.
Blogger Lindsay Redfern recently tackled that very topic on her blog, “The R
House.” She interviewed three women who had experienced the heartbreak
of losing a baby and shared their thoughts and insights in a series of posts
called “Understanding and Supporting Pregnancy Loss.” She shared what
she learned with Studio 5 host Brooke Walker.
Through an interview I did on my blog with three women who have
experienced pregnancy loss, I realized that I had so much to learn even
someone who is very involved in the infertility community. I hope to pass
what I learned onto you to increase sensitivity towards those who have
suffered from pregnancy loss and miscarriages.
Things to avoid:
· “It was for the best.”
· “There was probably something wrong with the baby anyway.”
· “You can have another baby.”
· “You already have another child, can’t you just be thankful for that
· “When are you going to try for another one?”
· Don’t rank tragedy
· Don’t compare
· Don’t judge grief
Things to DO:
· Do remember. It’s for this reason I design necklaces for mothers who
have experienced pregnancy loss, or infertility. My hope is to provide a way
for them to know someone cares, and someone remembers.
· Do use the right terminology: Ask you loved one in a sincere manner
what terminology you they would like you to use. Some women prefer the
“pregnancy loss” over “infant loss” or “miscarriage”–the medical term for
when a pregnancy ends before 20 weeks. Not all those who have
experienced pregnancy loss consider themselves “infertile.”
· Realize that these couples feel deeply about the baby they were once
carrying and many consider the baby part of their family and mourn the
loss just as they would the death of a family member.
· Use the appropriate and sensitive phrase: “I am so sorry for your loss.”
To read Lindsey’s complete post “Understanding and Supporting Pregnancy
Loss: Do’s and Don Not’s, click here:
To shop her jewelry, The R House Couture, click here: www.therhouse.etsy.com