It seems that some couples have the secret to a happy relationship. They somehow manage to know the things to say or do to have a healthy and strong marriage.
Studio 5 Relationship Coach Dr. Matt Townsend found three such couples to analyze the qualities and behaviors that help their relationships.
Kenzie and Jason Towner: Constant Cheerleaders for each other –
Kenzie and Jason Towner are excellent at having a constant flow of unconditional regard for each other. As a busy young family and parents of two boys, you can regularly see posts on Kenzie’s Facebook page praising the hard work or positive traits of her husband . .”my handsome handyman did it again, Owen’s new bed built by his dad! Thanks babe, XOXO Love”.
When they are in public you can see both of them by each other’s side. One of the most important signs of how a couple is doing is the way they talk about their partner. Do you talk positively about your partner? Do your compliments about and to your partner flow freely and unconditionally like Kenzie and Jason’s?
Leon and Karen Peterson: Shared Passion for Music and Service –
Another critical component of healthy relationships is to have some shared hobbies and passions. Leon and Karen Peterson model this relationship skill with their joint love of classical music in all its forms. Many times a year Karen and Leon Peterson, a couple married more than 45 years, put on a concert at their cabin up near Wanship Utah, by hiring out a half a dozen of Utah’s finest musicians: piano players, opera singers and violinists etc. These mini concerts of 60 or so people, along with their work providing dozens of scholarships for music students at the U of U School of Music allow the Petersons to share their passion for music with their friends and family. Together they are influencing the younger generations to see the power that classical music and shared passion towards something can have towards creating a healthy marriage.
Susan and Roy Payne: Unconditional love and Service –
Susan Payne teaches us that Love is an action, not just a feeling. No attribute is more important to creating a healthy, enduring marriage than the act of selfless service. Susan and Roy Payne have been married 46 years, with Susan being about 5 years younger than Roy. As a junior member of this senior couple, Susan has the special priviledge of being the primary care giver to her ailing husband Roy. When her Roy’s health had deteriorated to a point that he needed constant care, Susan didn’t send her husband off to a care facility to live out his remaining days, but instead she herself chose to live in the care facility with him. As a healthy young senior, Susan is now squarely in the position to serve, not only her husband, but the other 10 or so residents in the senior care facility. She spends the day taking care of her husband and makes sure to check in on every over resident throughout the day. Susan does not rest at night until every resident is comfortably sleeping at night. Susan is showing us that loving your partner is not just a feeling that someone feels, but instead is a never ending set of activities that we can offer as long as we live.