Pay it forward and spread love and kindness!
The world often feels like a give-and-take economy, but the key to deeper and more meaningful relationships isn’t about keeping score. Instead, we should embrace the mindset of paying it forward. This approach can transform the way we give, receive, and connect with others.
Author and speaker Brooke Romney noticed a trend in New Year’s resolutions focused on stopping efforts for those who don’t reciprocate. While it’s important to recognize our limits, Brooke felt this mindset didn’t sit right with her. Reflecting on those who had poured into her life without expecting anything in return, she realized there had to be a different way to view giving and receiving.
The Scorecard Trap
It’s easy to fall into the trap of keeping a scorecard of our actions versus others’. Brooke explained, “As humans, we over-index what we do and under-index what other people do.” For example, someone might feel unappreciated for hosting gatherings without realizing the same person checks in on them regularly or helps in other meaningful ways. Recognizing that everyone has different capacities and strengths can help us appreciate the various ways people show love.
Three Principles of Paying It Forward
Brooke outlined three principles to guide us in this mindset:
Love or Do the Best We Can: Whenever we have extra capacity to love, we should use it without worrying about repayment. Giving should come from a place of abundance and willingness.
Receiving Love and Service: Accepting help can be challenging, but it’s essential for building connections. Brooke emphasized the importance of saying yes to offers of assistance and doing so with gratitude.
Paying It Forward: Instead of feeling obligated to repay someone directly, we can pass on the kindness to others. Brooke shared a personal story of how a family helped her during a busy season, and now she pays it forward by helping others in similar situations.
Accepting with Gratitude
Accepting help with gratitude can be difficult, especially for those who are used to being self-sufficient. Brooke encouraged viewers to let go of guilt and recognize the value in allowing others to serve us. This mutual exchange strengthens relationships and fosters a sense of community.
Paying it forward is about more than just balancing the scales. It’s about creating a cycle of generosity and connection that enriches everyone’s lives. By embracing this mindset, we can build stronger, more supportive relationships and communities.
Find more from Brooke on Instagram, @brookeromneywrites.
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