It’s easy to beat yourself up when you’ve failed. But don’t stop believing!
Whether you’ve experienced a major failure or a minor one, there are ways to
As long as we’re alive we will have experiences that we will deem successful
and experiences we would label as failures. So how do we keep believing and
how do we move forward when we’ve experienced a “failure?”
Here are three tips that can help you move forward with insight, ease, and
1. Get Perspective. We often attach a failure, which is usually an
our identity (who we are). Realize that a failed business, marriage, goal,
weight loss program, etc. doesn’t mean that we are failures or that we are
“bad” or not worthy, yet rather that failure is an event that we have a choice
of how we respond to it. One of the most empowering life formulas I’ve
learned is Event + Response = Outcome. What this is teaching is that we can
always choose how we respond to the event and in this case that event is a
perceived failure. The outcome of our lives and our results hinges on how we
choose to respond. Rather than take it on as your identity, choose to study it
and analyze what you can learn from this experience.
2. Learn the Lesson! Within every failure, or what I like to call
experiences” is a valuable lesson should we choose to learn it. Napolean Hill
of the classic book, Think & Grow Rich, has stated: “Every adversity has
within it a seed of equal or greater opportunity.” Every failure has within it
seeds of powerful lessons – the same seeds that hold the keys to your
success. So take the time to journal and capture your responses to the
question, “What can I learn from this?” or “What is this here to teach me?”.
When we take the time to evaluate our failures and find the lessons within
them, we gain valuable gems and insights that turn that failure into a success
for ourselves. There is always a lesson to be gained, no matter how drastic or
painful the situation is. I have learned that as I see my adversities or failures
as great, sacred teachers, I receive gifts and guidance for my life and path in
profound ways. You will too. So take the time to answer thoughtfully what
you have learned or are learning from this perceived failure…you’ll likely see
that this failure turned into great growth for you and therefore, it may not be
a failure after all!
3. Be Kind to Yourself. As the best selling author and teacher,
has wisely said, “You don’t remedy anything by condemning it.” Many people
are their toughest critic. They can be harsh and mean to themselves. That is
a choice and as a coach, I encourage you to choose to be kind to yourself as
you navigate this life. Realize that failure or perceived failure, required that
you likely took a risk – relationship, business, goals, etc – and that risking
takes courage. Be gentle with yourself. Be kind. Treat yourself like you would
a dear friend. And if you are ready to change this “failure” into your friend
and of valuable success, it will come through love and acceptance versus
guilt and condemnation.
I cheer you on in the pursuit of your goals and dreams! I invite you to
reconsider how you view your failures and to choose to see them as growing
experiences with valuable lessons for your future growth and success. I
believe in you and I invite you to do the same!
All my best,
For more information on how to live your ideal life and for valuable free
resources to do so, visit, www.thelighthouseprinciple